Shikamaru, the idiot!
by Sarali
Summary: Hell hath no fury like a scorned woman.


**Summary:** Hell hath no fury like a scorned woman.

**Rating:** T

**Disclaimer:** The characters don't belong to me.

**A/N:** Well this is a fic to all the Shika/Ino fans, felt like writing a drabble. Enjoy!

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_**Shikamaru, the Idiot!**_

He was dead, so dead.

Dead as the dead duck floating around in the pond in the backyard. It was still there? Oh poor duckie. She really hadn't meant to kill it; it was that stupid idiot's fault! If he hadn't riled her up so badly she wouldn't have chucked that chunk of bread at him. That stupid bastard - he just had to be a super duper ninja and he just had to dodge it. Ooooh, if he hadn't dodged it, that poor duck wouldn't have been dead. And it's still there; bless its stupid flailing soul.

Argh! What was she thinking? Concentrate, woman! Think about the different ways she could kill that idiot mercilessly. Think about the panicked look on his face and his flailing arms as she diced him into little pieces. She hated him, hated him with a passion. How dare he forget one of the most important days in their lives? Hadn't she made it blatantly obvious to him that today was an important day to them?

But noooooo!

And that stupid hokage of theirs. Their main strategist! BAH! What main strategist? Stealing her husband on this day, and that stupid bastard, he just had to go! She was going to strangle Naruto when she got her hands on him next! Sure, Sakura would probably kill her but at that moment she hardly cared.

He was such an insensitive, lazy, uncaring and unthinking bastard. She was surprised with herself that she even married him. She really shouldn't have bothered. She had even packed a lovely lunch for him. Sure, she packed lunch for him everyday, but today she had packed all the lovely food in a heart shaped lunch box. Surely, him being the smartest ninja in the village should have figured it out.

BUT NOOOOOO!

He was too thoughtless, uncaring, insensitive, lazy and stupid to figure it out. For god's sake, MEN! They were all the same, all of them tactless and stupid.

And the way he had said goodbye, "Ja Ino, I'll be off." What the hell was that? Where was the kiss? Where was the loving hug? Where was the 'Bye sweetheart!'? What was she, a stupid dog? "Ja Ino, I'll be off." Stupid idiot! Unfeeling bastard! And when she had told him to return early tonight he had just muttered a lazy "Hai, hai."

Sometimes she just wanted to grasp that "Hai, hai," and shove it back down his throat and choke him, strangle him and kill him! Argh! What was she thinking, she really was going mad. That IDIOT! It was all that good-for-nothing prat's fault. If only he had figured it out like he was supposed to. She was going to strangle him when he came back.

"Ino, I'm home."

She heard his lazy voice call to her from the doorway. Speak of the devil! He actually had the nerve to sound like he couldn't be bothered to tell her that he was back. But then again, he didn't need to; after all she had been a jounin ranking ninja before she had _given_ all that _up_ for this marriage. She could sense his stupid chakra approaching their home long before he announced it. Stupid idiot, did he think that just because he could beat her in a fight, she was _weak_? Weak she was not! How _dare_ he think like that!

"Ino!" She heard him call out to her and nearly jumped with surprise as she whirled around to glare at him. It must have been the furious look on her face, her blazing eyes and the stance of her body, because he stepped back in surprise.

"What did I do this time?" His face might have been wary, but his voice was still as lazy as ever. She felt the dam of anger in her burst.

"What did you do? I'LL TELL YOU WHAT YOU DID! YOU FORGOT OUR FIRST YEAR ANNIVERSARY. THAT'S WHAT," she screeched at him.

Along with her wild hair and wild flailing arms, she must have looked like a banshee, but she wanted to scare him and it was working. He looked downright scared; she wouldn't have been surprised if he peed in his pants. Would surely serve him right!

She heard him breathe out an "Oh shit!" before she started screaming at him again. "I hate you, Shikamaru, YOU IDIOT! You know what? From now on you can sleep on the couch, and don't talk to me, EVER AGAIN!"

She stomped off to their room. She knew she was being petty, but he did deserve it for leaving her alone in the morning while she had been in a horny mood. Just before she closed the door she glanced at him to find him still gaping at her, his mouth opening and closing like a cod fish out of water. She did feel sorry for him, but for the smartest ninja he surely was stupid.

She closed the door with a bang just for the effect of it before locking it. It was vindictive, immature and petty, but she was in no mood to share. Leaving her longing that morning with a "Ja Ino, I'm off," had not been a good idea, but she was surprised that she actually had managed to confuse him. Surely he realized that their anniversary was next week, but she didn't mind. After all she would get the king size bed all to her self. And she would finally be able to sleep under the covers, god knows, Shikamaru was such a cover hog. She smirked at her brilliance. The prank had been brilliant.

God, how she loved her self!

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Please read and review yea 


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